Personal Year Spread

YAY! I'm back home from Vegas. Actually, I got in at 8:45 yesterday morning, then stayed at my mom's apartment for half the day. Two days is actually the perfect amount of time to be there. Despite the fact that I played poker in college, I don't really like to gamble much. The hotels on the strip are basically over-sized malls filled with stores that I can find at home. The highlight was seeing Cirque du Soleil's Ka. Absolutely moving artistically.

Now, enough about my time in Vegas. On to spreads! I had to work with Secret and Mermaids once I got home. This spread I found on Aecletic Tarot called the Personal Year spread. Considering that we are in the year of the Empress, and that's my personality and soul card, it was fitting to do it.

       4
3             5
      S/1
2             6
        7

S: The Empress

1. What do I bring to this current cycle? 10 of Cups

Despite everything that has gone on in the past year, I'm still maintaining a positive outlook on life. It has been such a major upgrade from the place I was last year.

2. What is this cycle's beneficial influence? 7 of Cups

I have this need to do so many different things, but I don't know where to begin. I want to take art classes, go back to the gym, pole dance, choreograph, do yoga, meditate, create my altar... All of that usually happens while I'm in bed.

3. What blocks or oppostions do I need to be aware of? The Magician

I may be so focused on myself and what I want that I may not see the big picture. Sometimes, it's just not all about me.

4. What area of my life will be most influenced by this cycle? Ace of Wands

It's creative bursts. It's having the ability to be artistic and creative.

5. What do I need to learn during this cycle? 3 of Wands

I need to learn to create opportunities for myself instead of sitting around and waiting for things to happen.

6. How can I incorporate these lessons into my life? 8 of Swords

I just need to stop with the indecisiveness and self-doubt. That kind of thinking will lead me nowhere.

7. What will be the most likely result at the end of this cycle? Queen of Pentacles

I identify with this queen the most of the four in Secret. I think it's allowing myself to be even more nurturing in my career (dance and makeup), and continue to develop my skills.

Valentine's Day Spread

To top the icing of the suckage cake, there's a video of the event and I'm not in it. Of everything that went on, I'm the only one not in the video. Yeah, ultimate fail.

Fortunately, I had a great reading from Kafka's Ghost. It's so amazing how despite the distance, she's very in tune with me. She has a great skill. She gave me some huge insights on what I think I need and the changes that are going on right now. Love ya, KG!

I decided to do a Valentine's Day spread found here. I decided to use Mermaids for this spread.

1. Past experience with love. Knight of Swords

Whenever someone has expressed interest in me, I would practically flee like this knight is doing. I'd say to myself, "Why is this person interested in me? I don't think I'm anything special." I was all about retreating into myself.

2. Current experience with love. The Hanged Man

A whole lot of nothing is happening right now. I'm just in a stagnant place. Nothing moving forward or back. It just...is. 

3. What you have to give in a love relationship. Knave of Swords

I guess I'm up for the challenge of being in a relationship.

4. What I want from a love relationship. 3 of Swords

How funny is it to get this card? What I want is honesty and truth. I want to know the truth, even if it means that I may get hurt.


5. What I need from a love relationship. The Empress

I think I need a relationship where I can fully be myself. A relationship where I can be nurturing to my partner, be sensual and feminine. I need to be that giver, but I also need to learn patience.

6. Future experiences with love. Queen of Swords

This card was interesting to see because I did another relationship spread and this queen came up in the "qualities I look for in a mate" position (using Secret). The Zodiac sign affiliated with her is Libra, who is also the sign of a certain new (now not so new, but you get the point) acquaintance. I don't want to get my hopes up, but it would be super awesome if it was him.

Elements of the Empress

As described in an earlier post, I had a conversation with Kafka's Ghost about finding spreads about my inner self, and what aspects of my self are coming forward. This is mostly due to the presence of the Empress (the first card I see when I open her Tarot of the Sephiroth, and it was one of the Present cards in the name spread). She is also my personality and soul card, and I feel her presence in full force now. She gave me the idea of a spread centered around her.

1     2     3

7     E     8

4     5     6

1, 2, 3 - Qualities of the conscious self
4, 5, 6 - Qualities of the unconscious self
7 - Past self
8 - Future self

1, 2, 3 - 5 of Pentacles, Knight of Swords, 9 of Cups

At first I was very confused by the presence of the 5 of Pentacles because there was nothing symbolically that made sense. It took a little while for it to actually hit me that I needed to pay attention to the image itself because it's pretty true. I do spend a lot of my free time in front of the camera as an artistic model. There's something beautiful about it, and I feel like I reach a higher plane of being. 

The Knight of Swords also makes a lot of sense, as I am very communicative. I will definitely give an opinion though I'm not exactly known for having the most tact. I don't say inappropriate things, but I have a tendency to not think before I speak.

The 9 of Cups is my artist card. It's my creative force. It represents the pleasure I get when I pour my soul into my dance. I think this is when my bond with Her is the strongest. That is where She's channeling Herself into me, and I become Her vessel for expression.

4, 5, 6 - Queen of Pentacles, King of Wands, 6 of Cups

The Queen of Pentacles is a nurturing woman. Dependable. She is also very encouraging. She's the one to turn to when someone needs some very practical advice. This does make sense as I have found myself to be the person that people do turn to for advice. I think she is a positive queen for me, where the Queen of Swords represents the negative aspect of me.

The King of Wands appears a lot in different spreads. I can tell that he has quite the magnetic personality. I like looking at him when he appears. He draws me in. I think that's what I have when people get to know me. I seem to draw people in. Sometimes men tell me that they're extremely attracted to me despite the fact that I don't do anything to warrant it. I think I have a big personality, and like him, I usually stop at nothing to get my way.

Seeing the 6 of Cups was quite interesting to me. I think it's because I have this tendency to replay good events in my head. It's something that I love to do, and I love the fact that it distracts me from the present.

7 - The Hermit

Hmmm... I would say seeing the Hermit is pretty valid. I was constantly searching for who I was. I still am, but I was definitely lost. I never felt comfortable in the 9-5 world. I was constantly changing my appearance. Despite having friends, I was often very solitary. I would retreat into myself.

8 - 8 of Swords

Gah! This damned 8 of Swords! I am so sick of seeing this card, although it reflects how I'm feeling. There is this internal conflict of wanting to come into my own as a woman, but other forces want to keep me in a box. I think the difference is that I'm not having it. My struggle is how to move forward to come into my inner Empress.

Thoughts are always welcome.

Goddess Spread

I found this spread on Aeclectic Forum, and I thought it would be cool to do a reading on it. I would love to start building an altar to Her, but that's going to have to wait. Here is the layout of the spread.

1   2   3
     4
     5

1. You. Where you find Goddess. Your opinion towards Her. Your experience with Her so far. 6 of Cups

I look at Her with fondness and joy. I feel like I am closest with her when I think of happy memories, or when I need a gentle nudge.

2. Relation. How you have interacted with Her and what you have shared in acts and prayer. The Empress

I feel like she is with me during meditation. She's also with me when I feel that inspiration to create choreography and dance. My dance is my offering to her.

3. Goddess. Goddess aspects you have witnessed and what She has granted. Queen of Cups

She has given me sensuality, the ability to love and the ability to be open to receive love. She allows me to open my intuition, and She allows me to be a vessel to create Her message.

4. Method. Future advice on how to heighten relationship with Goddess. 8 of Wands

I must not be afraid to actually contact Her directly. She is open to listening.

5. Tangible. Advice on physical worship and how to adorn Her. The Tower

I was stumped when I saw this. I think this also relates to Card 4 in that I have to actually contact Her. Let Her be a part of me. Invoking the spirit.