Palette of Creative Possibilities

I found this absolutely amazing spread on TarotPassages.com called the Palette of Creative Possibilities. Considering that I'm feeling very artistic but having major difficulties in choosing how to express it (wanting to dance, to design costumes for dance and Burning Man, to do makeup etc.), it was just a great spread to find. I'm not even going to attempt recreating the layout on here, but you can see it on the link.

1. The grip: What hold does the creative process have on me at this time? The World

Wow. What a card to appear as the very first card. This card is about my freedom of expression. For the longest time, I felt like I couldn't do that, but now I may actually have the opportunity to do so. It's quite amazing to be able to be free to dance and to do art. It's the place that makes me the happiest.

2. My brushes: How can I best utilize the tools at hand? The Star

It's about trusting in my skills. It's trusting in my abilities. Once I do that, I can develop my creativity even further. I have to trust in my years of dance. Trust that I've learned a lot in makeup and that I still have a lot to learn.

3. Primary color: What sparks my creative impulses? The Lovers

It's what my soul needs. I don't choose when the spark happens. It just does. It's a tug in my gut that I can't ignore. I don't always act on this impulse, but it's so overwhelming actually.

4. Secondary color: What fuels my motivation? 8 of Pentacles

I have a desire to make it perfect. I want it to be clean and polished while allowing my art to express my point of view. I also have a never-ending desire to learn. I'm willing to clean brushes all day if it means that I can learn techniques from a great MUA. I love taking dance workshops and being a student. It's like, yes, I've been belly dancing for over eight years, but I love the feeling of being a complete beginner with the frustrations and all (I think a Suhaila workshop is next on my list).

5. Tertiary color: What drives my long-term commitment to the project? The Hanged Man

I'm giving myself to the universe, and for that moment when I'm on the stage or working on a face or in a sketchbook I'm in a vulnerable place. I've been feeling more that when I do an emotionally meaningful piece, I'm reaching something/one that's beyond my scope of understanding.

6. Painting medium: What can I add to extend and develop my creativity to bring it to a finished result? 8 of Swords

One of the gripes that I have when I see a lot of dancers, especially in tribal fusion, is that I see the technique and the tricks in the movement, but it often misses that something extra. That thing that draws me in and lets me join in on the experience. When I perform, I often wonder if I'm resting on my laurels, and not truly engaging the audience. At the same time, it's scary to be that vulnerable that I just want to show the technique and tricks. I have to endure the really scary aspect of my dance in order to take it to a higher place.

I'm going to sum up this reading in two words: Holy shit! Four majors, and a pair of 8s. Aeclectic Tarot's definition of the 8s involves courage and transformation. It's about having the strength to make change. Wow, how very telling, indeed. I also added up the numbers of the Majors which came to 11 - Justice, and reduced to the High Priestess. Justice is saying that I spent a good portion of my life doing one thing, while denying a part of myself that really wanted to come out. I guess the lay-off has allowed for that other part to come back. The High Priestess is showing me how I can do this while being in the current place I'm in.

Valentine's Day Spread

To top the icing of the suckage cake, there's a video of the event and I'm not in it. Of everything that went on, I'm the only one not in the video. Yeah, ultimate fail.

Fortunately, I had a great reading from Kafka's Ghost. It's so amazing how despite the distance, she's very in tune with me. She has a great skill. She gave me some huge insights on what I think I need and the changes that are going on right now. Love ya, KG!

I decided to do a Valentine's Day spread found here. I decided to use Mermaids for this spread.

1. Past experience with love. Knight of Swords

Whenever someone has expressed interest in me, I would practically flee like this knight is doing. I'd say to myself, "Why is this person interested in me? I don't think I'm anything special." I was all about retreating into myself.

2. Current experience with love. The Hanged Man

A whole lot of nothing is happening right now. I'm just in a stagnant place. Nothing moving forward or back. It just...is. 

3. What you have to give in a love relationship. Knave of Swords

I guess I'm up for the challenge of being in a relationship.

4. What I want from a love relationship. 3 of Swords

How funny is it to get this card? What I want is honesty and truth. I want to know the truth, even if it means that I may get hurt.


5. What I need from a love relationship. The Empress

I think I need a relationship where I can fully be myself. A relationship where I can be nurturing to my partner, be sensual and feminine. I need to be that giver, but I also need to learn patience.

6. Future experiences with love. Queen of Swords

This card was interesting to see because I did another relationship spread and this queen came up in the "qualities I look for in a mate" position (using Secret). The Zodiac sign affiliated with her is Libra, who is also the sign of a certain new (now not so new, but you get the point) acquaintance. I don't want to get my hopes up, but it would be super awesome if it was him.

Spirit Guide #3

Now let's say hello to spirit guide #3! She's (confirmed through Paul's Spirit Guide spread) very similar to spirit guide #2 in that she'd smack me if necessary. They're definitely partners in crime.

1. Tell me a little bit about your personality. The Magician

I want to take the world by storm! I have lots of great plans and ideas for you. I'm a spark, of sorts.

2. Why are you with me? 10 of Swords

I want you to be who you really are, not what everyone expects you to be. I'm here to help you free yourself from toxic environments.

3. When is your presence strongest? Knave of Swords

I'm with you when you need a plan, a way to get out of a difficult situation. Or when you need to do something different.

4. Was there a specific moment where your presences was strongest? Ace of Swords

I was with you when you decided that you were not meant to work a normal 9-5, but rather you wanted to pursue what you really wanted.

5. Is there anything you'd like me to know? The Hanged Man

You've got to take initiative for yourself. You can't wait around for things to come to you. You have to make it happen.